“Which one of these is maroon?” Why the hell do I always play on maroon sports teams? Is it some kind of crazy masochism or a horrible cosmic joke? I swear, I’ve played on them since elementary school soccer. I love Virginia Tech football. And I’ve never been able to distinguish maroon from green.
“This one is. Wait, why are you asking?”
Because I want to make sure my bionic eye is working right. “Because I’m colorblind.”