The only part I didn’t remember clearly was the phase of the moon, which I looked up online
Part 2, Chapter 8
“Whoop!” she whooped as I knocked on the screen door leading into the little kitchen. In a blur of arms and brown hair and jeans, there she was in front of me opening the door, being casually stunning. “You came!”
“I know! I’m sorry I’m late. Here is some banana bread I made. There are walnuts in there.”
“Thank you!” She took it and put it somewhere, beckoning me into the cabin. “My parents are out taking a walk. Come take a tour!”
Cabin was a pretty good name for the interior. For all the prettiness outside, inside was a cozy mixture of wood paneling and huge windows. It was a perfect summer vacation home. We walked through the foyer-slash-kitchen-slash-mud-room into the living room, which was dominated by a massive window showing Portage Lake. To the left of the window was a little partitioned off area (there was a curtain rod with a swept-aside curtain acting as a divider) with just enough space for a bed, some suitcases, and a bedside table overflowing with books.
“I was beginning to wonder if you knew when teatime was,” she giggled. “Do you like my bedroom?”
Turning around, she then showed me her parents’ room and the bathroom, inviting me to keep out and help myself, respectively.
Details begin to resolve. There was a big table in front of the picture window with a 15% complete puzzle on it. There was an acoustic guitar in a case beside the fireplace, which was behind the sofa. The sky above the lake seemed above the legal limit of blue.
I was initially afraid of meeting her parents, not unusual given the extent to which I am initially afraid of meeting anyone, but once they walked in and her father started asking me physics hypotheticals as, like, conversation (consider a fluid dripping slowly onto an infinite flat surface, etc.), I felt totally at home.
We escaped alone off to dinner, Hot Copy Editor and I, chattering flirtatiously so much that we have to force ourselves to focus on the menus long enough to choose what turn out to be the exact same meals, requiring further negotiation and consultation viz-a-viz who would choose a backup and who gets the first choice (I let her win, naturally), because you just can’t go and order the same thing at a restaurant with a girl.
After dinner, the next stop was a supermarket for marshmallows and chocolate and graham crackers as the sun was starting to get extra yellow in preparation for the other colors to come. The house, the restaurant, and the little supermarket all seemed stuck in approximately 1983, style-wise. We stopped back at the cabin to rummage around for some newspaper and firewood in the nearby shed, then I drove her up to the beach of the real lake, Lake Michigan. We built a fire in the sand while the yellow turned to oranges and reds reflected in the baby lake-waves.
The fire wasn’t easy to build, but we worked collaboratively and used teamwork. I pretended my manliness would help. She claimed supremacy in terms of intuition. Eventually we got the marshmallows roasting, and ended up eating way too many s’mores while watching the sun drop below the horizon.
As the stars were variously deciding that there’s already been more than enough twilight, we’re burying each other’s feet in the beach’s sand and throwing the rest of the logs on the fire. There’s talk of old boyfriends and girlfriends. Laying back in the sand, we make up names for constellations that we can’t identify (I think she knew the right names, but my lack of astronomy knowledge is actually kind of disgraceful for someone who both has a physics degree and went to space camp) and she hires me to be the movie reviewer for the Arts and Entertainment section of the campus newspaper, newly her responsibility, a fact that will eventually require me to stop calling her Hot Copy Editor.
Nothing, like, happened. We just talked.
The stars had shifted significantly by the time I brought her home to the cabin, and her parents had been long asleep.
I bundled into my sleeping bag as she dropped into bed with the curtain between the living room and my bedroom still open. As I fall asleep to her increasingly regular and audible breathing, I’m thinking: why the hell does she have to have a boyfriend who isn’t me?
I dreamt vividly and hypothetically of making out with her.
—
I woke up once in the middle of the night. There was very little moon, so it was just starlight that gave a sense of unreality to the entire cabin. I become sleepily aware of quiet whimpering, then realize that there is whimpering because Hot Copy Editor is having the cutest nightmare ever into her pillow on the other side of the room.
Should I go wake her up? No, I’m already well on the wrong side of all kinds of ambiguious boundaries. I’d better just leave her alone. She’ll be okay.
I rolled over and went back to sleep.
April 2nd, 2007 at 10:58 am
Tip: never accept work offer from the girl you have a crush on, but on the other hand it is the perfect recipe for posts on this blog :D
April 2nd, 2007 at 4:24 pm
Now, not that I know this is true, but I have read or heard that the psychologically appropriate thing to do on that there beach is to make something *happen*, because your inability to do so may have painted you as a candidate for a friend rather than a candidate for a boyfriend.
As much as women may argue that keeping one’s hands to oneself is the proper thing to do, I think some of my past experiences might have ended up for the better if I would have listened more to my gut than to my ethical and nervous logic.
In summary: she wanted you. Can’t wait for the next segment.
April 3rd, 2007 at 5:13 am
JM’s right…she wanted you… *sigh*
April 7th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
Dude. I thought you might find it funny to note that today, I got a site visitor from Helsinki, Finland via (presumably) her search phrase poetry lesbian, who, having ascertained there was no actual “lesbian poetry” as such to be found on my website (occasional poetry by lesbians, yes, but not specifically with lesbian subject matter), stuck around for a grand total of 50 seconds and selected Awkward Things I Say to Girls from my blogroll as the out click.
Dunno if she was less likely to find what she was looking for here than at my humble site, but it gave me a much-needed laugh.
(And now that I’ve left a comment here with four - now make it five - instances of the word lesbian, who knows what that will do for your site stats.)
April 7th, 2007 at 12:21 pm
Also, spit out another chapter as soon as possible. You’re good.
April 9th, 2007 at 11:07 am
I third JM’s comment, though, I also believe it depends on who was ‘running the show’ so to speak. If she was coming up with the smore beach idea and all that, probably. But maybe that’s something she’s done before and just likes to do? I mean, I’m sure you’ve overanalyzed the whole thing eleventymillion times so if you want to make a mid week ANALYSIS blog, that’d be totally awesome!
April 9th, 2007 at 12:52 pm
I fourth JM’s comment, she wanted you.
Keep writing (and more often please!), I love your site, you are GREAT!
April 12th, 2007 at 5:46 am
Dude thats a ballsy move headin out to her little vaca spot. Nice work, way to give in to the chase. To quote one of the most influential ladies men of all times, Garth Algar, “Let me tell you something about women, Wayne. They want you to come get them, they LOVE it”
Nice Work
April 16th, 2007 at 5:19 am
Dude, I would just like to say that your writing style is quite lucid and engaging. It’s very nice to read! Although you said in one of your posts that 75% or so of your readership may be female, i think that a lot of guys would enjoy this as well. Well, guys with a bit of intelligence and sensitivity.
Finding your blog was an act of random kindness gifted to me by unkown online gods and I must say that it was of great help to me at this point in time. For you see, ‘I’ have also said awkward things in very recent times to a girl that I am head over heels for. I have also had awkward moments. But what I have not had, is being able to hear another guy share his awkard moment with me. Friends are too macho to admit moments of weakness with the other sex and I appreciate your courage and creativity! Hey, i nearly forgot…This is YOUR Blog and not mine. Got to go. Thanks again mate.
P.S. Your writing has also inspired me to create a BLOG and you can tell by the length of my comment here that it has also inspired me to write! Kudos to you Justin. Cheers mate!
April 16th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
way to ruin my monday morning routine by not writing (twice in a row, for shame!).
April 16th, 2007 at 9:04 pm
Hey, where’d you vanish to? It’s been a while.
And by any chance, would you happen to have an ID on reddit with the name AwkwardThings?
April 16th, 2007 at 9:41 pm
I’m missing your stories - hope all it okay.
~Frigga
April 18th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
This is the sweetest story. Come back and tell us more!
April 23rd, 2007 at 2:03 pm
I love these! I am just frittering away time, hoping you’ll be back soon! I MUST know what’s next, please!
April 23rd, 2007 at 3:15 pm
I exist! And I have written another chapter! Mostly! I’ll get it up there within the next couple of days, don’t worry!
April 23rd, 2007 at 4:31 pm
I have been going through withdrawals.
April 24th, 2007 at 3:56 pm
This always happens to me — I find some site, get way into it, catch up on the archives and the the owner goes on extended hiatus, just as I’m excited about being able to follow along! I miss you already - write again soon!
April 26th, 2007 at 5:09 am
Justin, I feel there’s gonna be some street riots here on the net if you don’t post soon!
We fucking miss you!
April 27th, 2007 at 8:56 am
What, still no update? This is killing me. As of Monday morning I will be entirely cut off from civilization as we know it (no cell phone, no computer, no nothin’), and I’d so hoped to get in a health dose of ATISTG before heading off.
I realize you have other priorities besides my travel schedule, but c’mon man! View all the comments above! The people demand their favorite Awkward Things!
:)
April 27th, 2007 at 6:37 pm
I just dropped in and am anxious to hear what happened next. There has to be more!!
May 3rd, 2007 at 4:46 am
Just wanted to make it known that one more male actually reads your blog! Also, i wanted to ask if i could put a link to your site on my website? Great stories keep em coming!
October 12th, 2008 at 5:48 am
I hate it how people that are my age (15) all objectify women, and are (for lack of a better word) dicks, it gives girls a bad impression of guys; that all they want is sex and other such stuff. Then you have people who are alternative in any way, and they will love and cherish their girls as much as they can. I love your writing by the way